You Are Who You Meet!

Yes, it’s true, you ARE who you Meet.

You’re thinking, “Wait a minute Brigid, you mean that all these jerks I’m meeting are me?”

Sadly, if the quality of the people that you are meeting and allowing into your life is not high, then, yes, they are mirroring your self-image and the old sayings of our mother’s “like attracts like” and “birds of a feather flock together” are true.

Ok, so now you’re adrenalin is a bit “up” and your face is red, and you’re thinking “this woman doesn’t know what she’s talking about”.

Take a deep breath.

There.

Now read on and see if you can grasp the concept I am putting forth to you.

Maybe you are meeting a lot of high quality people, people who are caring, responsible, relationship-ready….then this blog is not for you.  You already have enough self-respect and self-confidence to attract your mirror images and you will have some healthy choices to select from.  It is highly likely that you are not in need of a Tarot Reading, unless it is just to do a little spot check to see how things look to develop.  You are not my target audience.

If, on the other hand the men that you are meeting are self-centered, fear commitment, erratic, irresponsible, inconsistent in communication, or even worse, non-communicative, then you are my target audience.  You are even more part of this audience if you are already perceiving yourself in some sort of relationship but can’t define it because it is in limbo.  The reasons the relationship remains in limbo are very likely some combination of the aforementioned personality traits.

So, you view yourself as responsible, commitment-ready, stable, a good communicator, but the people who are stumbling into your life are not…….what does this mean????

You have no one to blame but yourself.

OOOOHHHH!  Another adrenalin rush.

Take a breath, a deep one.

Read ON…..

People will behave in self-centered and inconsiderate ways to you only when you ALLOW them to.

What????

Yes.  You are setting a precedent and condoning the poor treatment you may be receiving each and every time you accept these types of behaviors, you must learn to reject any and all unacceptable behaviors on the part of any one individual you allow into your life, whether it is a lover, a friend, a coworker, whomever, but most especially any one individual that you are considering having a romantic relationship with.

Love relationships only work when there is true respect and trust between the two people.

If you are always second guessing your partner’s next move, if you never feel secure about whether he’s going to call when he says he will, you are already on a slippery slope to deadendville.  You feel insecure about his calling because the last time he said he’d call during the week, he didn’t, and you got antsy and called him on Thursday and he cut it short and didn’t call you until the following Monday….

This is unacceptable behavior on the part of the person you have allowed into your life.

What to do?

You cannot control the other person.

The only thing you can control is yourself!!

So what do you do when he doesn’t call as he said he would?

NOTHING!!!

You simply REJECT THE UNACCEPTABLE BEHAVIOUR!  

What does that mean?

It means that you do not allow people to treat you in disrespectful or neglectful ways.  You never chase after someone whom is not giving you proper attention, you withdraw from the situation.  By withdrawing you are giving them a very clear message that if they expect to have a chance of being part of your world they must treat you with respect.

You are who you meet.  It is as simple as that.  Demand to be treated well, if you receive anything less, reject it!  Don’t expect to receive proper treatment from a person who thinks that you are always available at their beck and call, these types of people will always take you for granted and will only give you proper attention when they feel like it, it won’t change by allowing it to continue, the only way it will be changed is by you changing yourself and having the self-respect and self-confidence to say to yourself  “I will not tolerate being treated this way, I deserve better, and I WILL FIND BETTER!”

If the person in question adjusts and corrects their treatment of you, reward their good behavior by gracing them with your attention, if not, it’s no big loss!!  They weren’t worth your time and don’t deserve a great person like you!

YOU ARE WHO YOU MEET!  BECOME THE PERSON WHOM OTHERS TREAT WITH DIGNITY AND RESPECT AND THAT IS WHAT YOU WILL ATTRACT!!

Oh, I hear some of you lamenting now “But I love him!  I want him!  If I don’t keep myself on hold for him he will find someone else!”

STOP THAT!

That is not love.  Love is a combination of affection, sexual attraction, chemistry, trust and respect and validation of feelings.  Sitting around waiting and wondering if he will call while he is out doing his own thing is not going to change things.  Getting off your butt and making plans to go out and socialize and meet even more (and potentially BETTER) people will. 

Either

a)      The original love interest will realize you are not on hold for him/her anymore and puts forth the proper effort

or

b)      You will meet someone new who starts off right out of the gate giving you the proper attention.

YOU ARE WHO YOU MEET!

Read The Dating Game by Brigid Bishop 

For Tips On How To Meet Men Read: 

 "Where Is My John Wayne?"

Brigid Bishop